Today as I sat and listened in church I realized that I have spent my life at Marah. The water in the desert was from God and it was life giving, but it has always been so bitter that I drank it and choked a lot. So, now I need to find a way to make the water sweet. God showed Moses a tree to toss in the water at Marah to make it sweet, so I need God to show me how to make the water of my life sweet when it has always been bitter. I drink the water that God has provided and try to move forward, but it has always been a bitter experience and more of a duty than a joyful joining. The water has keep me alive and going, but it has always been bitter and therefore more of a unhappy life neccesity that must be born rather than the sweet refreshing that it should be. I am not sure what to do with this or where to go with it, but I am hoping that God will point out a tree in the near future so the water can be changed.
But I have to admit that I honestly don't want the water to be turned sweet, I want different water. I will accept the life I am given if I must but I cannnot honestly ever imagine enjoying it or wanting it to be this way... well that seems like the preface for a miricle LOL. Saddly enough, a miricle I don't realy want, but will accept if there is no other way.
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